ever felt like the world is coming to an end? ever felt that theres no one you can trust? ever felt like you are alone in this miserable world of ours? lost all hope and interest in everything? well if so...you can find out first hand what its like to be me right now.
it really seems like my world is falling apart bit by bit. from the very beginning of JC life up till now. i really do not know what the fuck im doing...i feel lost and i feel like a social reject.
whats worse now is that i am really REALLY exhausted. both physically and mentally. whats worse is that i am numb to my emotions already. i cant feel...most of the time i would be too tired to 'feel'..well although theres really nothing for me. oh well..thats my life. what can i do?
the holidays are coming up and i really do not know what i can do to fully utilise it. study? play? or just emo one corner? as you can see, i am really screwed. i do not have any solid plan in mind and i really do not know where the hell or what the hell im doing. will i sink deeper? only time will tell...
the only thing that i feel right now is hate...deep hatred to those that have hurt me and pushed me aside. irritated by the fact that theres so much pressure to take. hey for fucks sake...im only human.