LIFE...a small word but with a big meaning behind it. it is a great and wonderful thing. yet so fragile...
my aunt passed away yesterday morning. it all happened so fast. so quick..so unexpected. even i was equally shocked to hear that she was on the verge of death on friday morning. me... a person who always take things as they come, never put much effort into anything, always waiting for the impossible has been hit hard by this. seeing how my cousins grieve over their deceased mother made me feel as sad. even though shes only my aunt and not my mom, i feel that i have lost someone very close to me. honestly, i have never been really close to relatives from my father's side. i have 6 aunts and an uncle over from my dad's side. may or may not be considered a big family to some of you, but i rarely get to visit them. we only get to see each other a few times a year, during chinese new year and sometimes during year end holidays. so they are not very close as compared to relatives from my moms side. i have only two uncles from my mom's side. small compared to my dad's side.
when i saw how badly my cousins have been affected by their sudden deceased mother, it suddenly hit me...what will i do when my mom dies...i seriously do not want that to ever happen. thinking about it really makes me worried and scared. not for myself, but for my parents. i really want to do something for them during this life time. i really owe them too much. not only did they brought me up, they were always there for me and supported my every move. although there were times when we argued and disagreed with each other, i still love them very much. its a good thing that my cousins are all adults already and are able to look after themselves. cant imagine what it would be like if they were still attending school.
i remember what my deceased aunt once told me..."wei wei, dont cry...one day you will prove to the whole world that you are a smart and capable man. and aunty will be so proud of you." FYI i was a little boy who would always cry, because i always do not get what i want and sometimes i get bullied.
but with those words, i changed...i do not easily cry these days and of course i almost never get bullied by anyone anymore because my aunt gave me the confidence to face this cruel world...thank you. even though we are not really that close, i really want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.
may you find peace...